TMI Tuesday -Comfort and Thrill of Sex

1. How do you feel about giving anal sex (penetration with penis, finger or sex toys)?

a. I love it.

b. I enjoy it.

c. I’m ok with it.

d. I don’t really enjoy it.

e. I don’t enjoy it at all.

f. I have never given anal sex.

g. I have never given anal sex, but would like to start.

I enjoy anal play with Miguel. It is something I wouldn’t give to just anyone.

2. How do you feel about receiving anal sex (penetration with penis, finger or sex toys)?

a. I love it.

b. I enjoy it.

c. I’m ok with it.

d. I don’t enjoy it at all.

e. I have never received anal sex.

f. I have never received anal sex, but would like to start.

A little bit of anal play is fun and I love it. I don’t allow random playmates to go there with me. Full on anal with toys or anything more than a finger is something I only trust to Miguel.

3. How do you feel about getting undressed in front of a new lover, for the first time, as he/she watches you?

a. It’s a turn on for me.

b. It turns me on a little bit.

c. I like it, but only because it gets him/her going.

d. It does nothing for me.

e. I don’t like doing it because I am shy.

f. I don’t like doing it because I think it’s immoral/improper.

I am not as shy as I used to be…

4. Do you express your sexual pleasure with moans, groans, sighs, and other noises (provided that you are actually turned on)?

a. Yes, each time I have sex (90-100% of the time).

b. Yes, on most occasions (70-89% of the time).

c. Yes, on some occasions (40-69% of the time).

d. Yes, on a few occasions (10-39% of the time).

e. Yes, but only on special occasions (1-9% of the time).

f. Never, not even when I am really turned on.

The noise of sex is such a turn on. I have had silent sex before and it can be sexy, trying to be quiet hoping not to get caught or whatever. But being able to express to my partner that I am enjoying it by letting out whatever feels good, that is just damn sexy. On the other hand, it is such a turn off to hear someone forcing sex sounds (think corny porn).

5. Do you talk to your partner in a sexually explicit way?

a. Talking dirty is one of our favorite activities.

b. Occasionally, I like to talk dirty with my partner, and I do it with ease.

c. I talk dirty with my partner, but it feels awkward.

d. I would like to talk dirty with my partner, but I don’t dare for fear of being judged or ridiculed.

e. I would like to talk dirty with my partner, but she/he isn’t into it.

f. I don’t talk in such a way because I think it is inappropriate.

g. I don’t talk in such a way because I can’t bring myself to do it.

It is such a turn on to hear Miguel talk dirty to me. I get turned on talking dirty to him as well.

6. What kind of animal do you most sound like when building to a climax?

a. quiet little mouse

b. low moaning wolf

c. screeching beluga whale

I don’t think this question had nearly enough options.

Bonus: Which do you prefer comfort sex or thrill-seeking sex? Why?

Obviously, I love thrill-seeking sex. Regular readers of my blog already knew that. As a swinger, I get plenty of thrill sex to keep me happy. Comfort sex is awesome, but while we are young we are going more for the thrill of sex than the comfort of it!

Comfort seekers value deep intimacy, quiet engagement and trust over time of familiar relationships. For them sex is best as a safe, loving nurturing space.*
Thrill seekers value wild energy, adventure and novelty; they are willing to try open relationships, testing themselves outside average sexual practices. These folks crave a place to push the boundaries of new experiences.*

*Adapted from Susan Mernit’s blog

2 comments

  1. Hedone says:

    2. It is a matter of trust, isn’t it. My ex-bf and I tried anal. It was the first time for each of us. We learned together and got used to it together. I loved him dearly and trusted him. Around the third time we did anal, I really got into it with him. It blew his mind. He still talks about “that time” today although he has a new girlfriend and they do anal all the time :)

    4. Love your response.

    6. I was thinking of adding other options but couldn’t think of more then I got side tracked. Care to share your idea for options? I’d love to hear them :)

    Bonus: Interesting answer you wrote. When I was younger I was a very confident person but not sexually confident or I just didn’t have the knowledge or feel empowered to express myself sexually. I wasn’t raised in that mindset. So it wasn’t until my mid-thirties that I took control of how and when I wanted my sex.

    I think it’s this way for many women say 38 yrs. of age or older. Also, you being a swinger you already ARE freely expressing yourself sexually and are a thrill-seeker. You’ll be that way the rest of your life, I think.

    Me? I am making up for lost time :D

    Good answers.

    Have a great week.

    -H

  2. “I have had silent sex before and it can be sexy, trying to be quiet hoping not to get caught or whatever.” Good point. That hadn’t occurred to us; we mostly consider the frustration of needing to be silent, but it can be a very fun challenge.
    Jack and Jill would like you read..TMI Tuesday: July 17, 2012 – The Comfort and Thrill of SexMy Profile

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