Archive for sex blogger

Struggling with the Swing

jealousy

I have been wanting to blog about our last two hook-ups. The thing is that after thinking about the details, I have decided not to. There are some really good reasons for this…#1 reason, these folks read my blog. That puts undue pressure on my writing. I hate to fucking sensor myself. Sometimes it is not awesome that people actually read my posts. I hate the pressure of putting everything in a positive light. It is not all good, but it wasn’t all bad either.

One of the factors I have encountered with these last two hook-ups.

Jealousy.

I hate it, but it happens. I have shared before about my struggle with jealousy. I don’t always keep my emotions in check. I am fiercely jealous. I don’t/can’t stomach the thought of someone enjoying Miguel without me being right there. I have had my jealousy rage almost out of control before. This wasn’t like that. This was like a slight oversight. No rules were really broken on purpose. We were in the same room per se, but…same room slightly out of my line of vision. No, that’s not cool. Also really not cool, when I make someone else feel something like that when we play.

I am really sorry for that.

It is not that he had sex with another woman. It has nothing to do with her really. The mistake I made last year was that I thought it was person specific. We play with different people almost exclusively. You can think/talk about it all you want. You can’t always control how you feel. One of the most important thing about swinging is communication. I am very grateful that we proceeded into the lifestyle in a way that didn’t make me feel threatened. I felt like I could have stopped at any point and just knowing that made me feel free to explore until we evolved into the a comfortable place. I didn’t really feel any jealousy until last year. Then I felt like we needed to stop right there. As a result, we took a time out. Since communication is so essential I shared what it was about it that bothered me.

I don’t like the way the last two hook-ups went. If I could go back, I would have done things differently. I can’t. I can’t fix the fact that I made someone else feel like that. I know it was not anyone’s intention. I still would have went out on the dates. I still wouldn’t change our lifestyle. I am actually really glad that I felt jealous. Fear fuels my jealousy. Here is what happens as a result of my fear, I become a more attentive lover. I want nothing more than to please and keep my love’s affections. It is not that I actually think Miguel would leave me for a swinger hook-up, that is just ridiculous! It is just that I want to share in every orgasm he has with a woman. I want to be there to enjoy it. So what! So this is how we swing. I don’t think there is anything wrong with a little bit of jealousy, as long as it is communicated and not exploited.

Happy New Year!

Happy-New-Year-2012-Wallpapers-5-300x200

 

I had a really great time last night out at the club. I was delighted to spend the first few minutes of 2013 kissing the love and my life in a room full of sexy people. We almost stayed in this year for new years eve, I am glad we decided to go out. This past year has been full of changes for us. It was great to get out and celebrate that 2012 is finally over. I am excited about the changes to come.

Something great already happened this year. I woke up today to discover that Red Region had named my site as one of the sexiest of 2012! There are 40 blogs on this list, and all of them are worth a read. Check them out and discover some new sexy sites this year. Thank you Red Region! This list rocks and I feel very privileged to be part of it.

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I really, really appreciate it when people say they read my blog. It means my voice has an audience. I know the internet is full of people saying things, especially things about sex. I was thinking about what being sex blogger means. I think being a sex blogger has made me acutely more aware of my sexuality and for that I am so grateful. I am also really grateful to live in world with so many sexy bloggers.

I am starting my full time nights schedule this week at my new job. It has been years since I worked nights. My main concern is sleep. Wish me luck as I attempt this transition while the kids are out of school. I am sure they will allow me to sleep and not wake me up to break up stupid sibling rivalries. I am feeling strangely optimistic about the year to come. I know history has proved me wrong about this time and again but fuck it! I am feeling good and I am going ride this feeling out. New job, healthy kids, sexy man laying next to me. Life is good!

Happy New Year to all of you!

Q & A Swinger Style ~Lola & HH

Swinger Q & A

Lola and HH of mysexlifewithlola are hot bloggers with a very interesting lifestyle. I really wanted to include some hot bloggers in this feature. Mysexlifewithlola was most recently given a slot in the Top 100 Bloggers of 2012 (#35). They are a couple I have read about, fantasized about, and admired for a while.

They share their sexual exploits on the web. They have been playing like this for at least two years. Although they are a bit vague on all the details. I would really like to meet them in the flesh, but they play in a colder climate and there are a few states between us. The thing about their anonymity that is so intriguing is that this could be a couple you know. They could be your neighbors. This couple could be found anywhere in your community. They are a real sexy couple discreetly living out a fantasy sexual lifestyle.

While Lola and HH aren’t exactly typical swingers, they do enjoy sex with people outside of their relationship. There relations is a more one sided/open relationship known as a cuckold. Cuckolding is something we have run across in the lifestyle, although I have not mentioned it as such. It is close to swinging since their exploits do not lead to long lasting relationships or involve emotions other than lust. If a female wants to play and the man gets to watch, that is never really a problem for most swingers. This type of couple is usually well received in the lifestyle and can find plenty of action.

The way they meet people for play is not a shock to us. We have met some of our best hook-ups that way. The tone of the ad may sound harsh, but consider were this is going and you will understand the need for rules right from the jump. She spells her needs out perfectly. Even the lingo is typical of a swinger ad. Things like wanting to voice-verify and needing to see pics first tells me that this couples means business. Lola is a knockout that really has no problem finding men or women to play with. Don’t believe me? Just check out her calender….yes Lovelies, she is that kind of girl.

How did the two of you get into the lifestyle? Whose idea was it?

H.H. – First, I think we need to clarify a bit here.  We’re not exactly “swingers.”  Our kink is more Cuckolding.  To be more precise, Lo is, in the parlance of our times, a “hot wife,” though we are not married.  In our relationship she sleeps with basically whomever she wants, I don’t.  There are a few reasons for this.  First, Lo admits that she is not comfortable with my being with anyone else.  Second, I really feel no need to be with anyone else.  The question is how we got into this and I think we got into it because Lo (who is significantly younger than I) has a sexual appetite that exceeds my capabilities.  So, given that, and given that I’m very interested in pleasing Lo, I have no real need to have anyone else.  But, that said, I get a huge rush from hearing about Lo’s sexploits and/or sharing them with her.  I don’t really remember how we originally got into it, but it sort of developed naturally from Lo’s getting naked in front of my friends, hopping into bed with them, and doing other salacious things with people we interacted with socially.  When she saw that I not only didn’t mind, but enjoyed the flirting, we got a bit more serious trying to find her lovers and part-time boyfriends to keep her more satisfied.  

Lola – Baby, I was born this way!  

 

What was your first swinging experience like?

H.H. – We’ll I’ve given my point of view on this in the blog entry: “You Are The Best Thing – My Little Street Corner Girl.”  But here Lo can remark about it more from her point of view.  

Lola – Back seat of a car where I was penetrated in multiple places by multiple people. . . and it was all very hot and steamy until the copper showed up.   

 

How do you meet new people?

H.H. – So far we’ve met new people mostly through (sleazy as it may sound) Craigslist.  We’ve posted ads such as: 

Are you hard-up?  Are you handsome?  Hung? Healthy? D&D free?  Just need to get your rocks off on occasion and then split with no strings attached?  Well, then you may be for me.  I need a man who can come over on a moment’s notice, make me cum, and then leave on those nights when my bf isn’t home or is too tired for me.  I’m 1/2 of a Dec./May relationship (I’m Ms. May, of course) and my libido is too much for him to handle.  (Probably too much for you to handle too, but we’ll find out about that.) 

Musts: 1) Good-looking and fit (send photos to prove it); 2) Well-endowed.  (No need to show it in photo, but don’t fake it.  I’ll find out soon enough!); 3) Be reasonably literate (I want you to make me cum on the phone first.); 4) Be close by so that I can call you at 9, 10, 11, 12, or 1 for a quick one if I need it. 5) Be discrete. 

Must NOT: 1) Be looking for a relationship.  I have a loving man; I need more fucking; 2) Be disrespectful; 3) Interested in anything but sex. 

If this sounds like something you’re up for, then:  Send an e-mail with a pic (or four) and something about yourself.  Your pic gets mine.  If you like what you see, I will ask you to voice-verify.  If you’re good on the phone, then we can take it to the next level.

OK?

Thanks,

Lola 

Within minutes we’d have 50 or more e-mail responses.  By the end of the day there would be hundreds to choose from.  99% of them were fake, ugly, didn’t follow instructions, illiterate, or disqualifying in some other way.  A small percentage of them were rude, saying things like, “Way too much work.”  Well, those guys have no idea what they’re missing.  And Lo certainly wasn’t missing out on them.  Once in a great while Lo would find a guy who was easy on the eyes, wrote a decent and interesting response, and voice verified in a way that made her want more.  

We’ve tried looking into other venues – swinger sites, swinger classifieds, etc. –  but for various reason we haven’t had much luck with that.  Interestingly enough, no one (or almost no one) has propositioned Lo via the blog.  Our readers seem to be more voyeurs than interested in talking to Lo on the phone or meeting up.  

Lola – We’re not really “in” a swinger life-style group and meeting people is really the biggest obstacle.  I can’t get my hands and mouth on enough of such couples.  

 

Does anyone in your family know you swing? Do your co-workers know? Has anyone ever tried to talk you out of your lifestyle?

H.H. – Certainly not anyone from our family (though there may be two or three people we could open-up to without judgment).  None of my co-workers know about my secret life with Lo.  Some friends know, but not all of them understand.  

Lola – I honestly think that when I tell people what I do, they either get freaked out so much that they don’t know what to say, or they are colleagues of mine in a field where, at least on the surface, the expectation is that we can celebrate and embrace all gender and sexual identities and expressions.  

 

What was your most memorable swing experience? Sexiest experience or most horrific hook-up?

Lola – None of them were particularly WOW!  And, thankfully, all of them were good.  Not one was horrific.  I’m still waiting for the BIGGIE!  (Or the 10 person orgy.)

 

Any pet peeves in the lifestyle? (things that are a major turn off/red flag for you two)

Lola – Allow me to list: 1) a person who can’t make eye contact; 2) a person with no opinion about anything; 3) a person who doesn’t insist on getting the bill, even when I’m willing to pay; 3) small endowments (of any kind); 4) Republicans; 5) people who hate their relationships, jobs, or reasons for being (without actually doing anything to change those things they hate); 6) people who kiss only with their tongues and not with their lips; 7) people who come on like they’re ready for this, but then back out; 8) anti-feminists; 9) wanting to do so many things sexually, but being in a place where that just can’t happen; 10) people who are not curious enough to inquire about my favorite subject – ME!  

 

Your advice to a couple(or single) new to the lifestyle?

Lola – Check in with yourselves and your partners frequently.  Proceed only when you feel like you and your partners feel safe, comfortable, and enthusiastic about moving forward.  This is not always as easy as it sounds.  Remember, this is supposed to be FUN.  

H.H. – Establish rules.  Be clear on hard rules vs. soft rules.  Follow the rules.  If rules are made to be broken, only break the soft ones, never the hard ones.  Does that make sense? 

 

I am always curious about the couples I meet and would love to give them a chance to share some of their stories here. I am going to be featuring a new established couple on each post. If you are interested in being a part of this Q & A just contact me and let me know.

Top Sex Blogger 2012

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Thank you so much! I am #48 on the list of the Top Sex Bloggers of 2012!

Thanks to everyone who voted! I am floored that I made the list among such sexy sex bloggers. Thanks to all my stalkers here, on facebook, twitter and in the flesh. Thanks to Rori of betweenmysheets who puts this awesome list together every year. Thanks especially to you for taking the time to read this blog. (I still can’t believe there are more then two of you!)

Please check out the other awesome bloggers who made the list.

 

1. Molly from Molly’s Daily Kiss @mollysdailykiss
2. EA from Easily Aroused @EasilyAroused
3. Hyacinth Jones from A Dissolute Life Means…
4. Cheeky Minx from Love Hate Sex Cake @LoveHateSexCake
5. Amy from Anal Amy @AnalAmy
6. My Trousers Rolled from My Trousers Rolled @rolledtrousers
7. Sexual Life of a Wife from Sexual Life of a Wife
8. Dark Gracie from Gracie’s Playground @darkgracie
9. diirrty from d i i r r t y
10. nilla from Vanillamom’s Blog @swirlednilla
11. Suggestive Tongue from Suggestive Tongue @Suggestive
12. Sunny Megatron from Sunny Megatron @SunnyMegatron
13. Aisha from Being Aisha
14. Dev from Delving to Deviance
15. Amie Wee from Crevice Canyon @crevicecanyon
16. Remittance Girl from Remittance Girl @remittancegirl
17. Lady Dragonfly from Lady Dragonfly @miladydragonfly
18. paltego from Femdom Resource
19. Bella Blush from Clean, Moral, Polite
20. Girl on the Net from Girl on the Net @girlonthenet
21. Clarisse Thorn from Clarisse Thorn @clarissethorn
22. Kyle Mew from Kyle Mew @kylemmew
23. Violet+Rye from Uncommon Appetites @UCAppetites
24. Mina and Sylvanus from At Longing’s End @mydesire and @sylvanus
25. Athol Kay from Married Man Sex Life
26. Heather and Nikki from Vagina Antics @Heather_Cole1 and @Nikki_Blue1
27. Ferns from Domme Chronicles @Ferns__
28. Conina from Exploring Surrender
29. Kaya from Under His Hand
30. Joan Price from Better Than I Ever Expected @joanprice
31. Dumb Domme from Dumb Domme @DumbDomme
32. Sadie from That’s What Sadie Said
33. Nikki from Nikki True @Thenikkitrue
34. Lucas Brooks from Top To Bottom @Top2Bottom
35. HH and Lo from My Sex Life with Lola
36. Harper Elliot from (It Girl. Rag Doll) @HarperEliot
37. Charlie Glickman from Charlie Glickman @charlieglickman
38. Lady Cheeky from Smut for Smarties @Lady_Cheeky
39. TemptingSweets999 from Tempting Sweets: Story Heat
40. Monocle, Redbud, and Ximena from The Erotic Writer @_Monocle_ and @_Ximena_Writes_
41. Happy BDSM from Happy BDSM
42. Charlie Nox from Charlie Nox @charlienox
43. Theo Black from Theo Black
44. Chrystal Bougon from Bliss Radio
45. Rockin from Light Switch @RockinwithaCock
46. Dr. Marty Klein from Sexual Intelligence @drmartyklein
47. Miranda an Aaron from The Swinger’s Attic
48. Karen from Kissing Blue Karen @kissinbluekaren
49. Axe from Unspeakable Axe @unspeakableaxe
50. Peroxide from Submissive in Seattle @Peroxide__
51. Rachel Rabbit White from Rachel Rabbit White @rabbitwhite
52. Jill McDevitt from A Day in the Life of a Sexologist
53. LS&M from Love, Sex & Marriage
54. Hubman from Hubman’s Hangout @hubman38
55. Coyote’s Kitten from Kitten’s Paw Prints in Slavery @coyoteskitten
56. Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross from Dodson and Ross @dodsonandross
57. Daisy Danger from The True Life Sex Adventures of Daisy Danger @daisydanger
58. Oatmeal Girl from Submission & Metaphor @oatmeal_girl
59. Fatal from You Linger Like a Haunting Refrain
60. Ruby Ryer from Pegging Paradise @Ruby_Ryder
61. Kyle Jones from Butchtastic
62. Anakin and padme from Journey to the Darkside @AnakinDarth and @padmeamidala
63. Lady Pandorah from Lady Panorah’s Sanctuary @ladypandorah
64. Marie Rebelle from Rebel’s Notes @rebelsnotes
65 Thumper from Denying Thumber @thumperMN
66. Jade from Pieces of Jade @piecesofjade
67. Jason Stotts from Erosophia @jstotts
68. BD Swain from Leaning How To Tell You @redswain
69. Bre from Owned, Collared, Loved
70. Dangerous Lilly from This Could Be Dangerous @dangerouslilly
71. Modesty Ablaze from Modesty Ablaze @ablazingmodesty
72. Suzanne from All Mine
73. Kitty from My Secret Life
74. Domina Victoria Rage from Domina Victoria Rage @VictoriaRage
75. Sin from Finding My Submission
76. Maggie Mayhem from Miss Maggie Mahem @msmaggiemayhem
77. Artemisia Absinthium from Absinth Cocktail @ArtiAbsinthium
78. N. Likes from My Dissolute Life @nlikes
79. TheOthers1 from Undue Creativity
80. Roxy from Uncommon Curiosity @sroxy
81. Mollena from The Perverted Negress @Mollena
82. Jerome from Let’s Talk About Sex
83. Liza from Always Each Other @lizawrites
84. Figleaf from Real Adult Sex @talkingfigleaf
85. Red Vinyl Kitty from The Sub Mission @The_Sub_Mission
86. Omega and Mouse from The Power Exchange @talesofmouse
87. Innocent Loverboy from Innocent Loverboy @innocentlb
88. Shelby Cross from Shelby Cross, Writer
89. Blacksilk from Being Blacksilk @BlacksilkBlog
90. Kaleigh Trace from Fucking Facts @TheFuckingFacts
91. Romantic Dominant from A Faded Romantic’s Notebook
92. BiLikesSciFi from A Tale of Bi and Bi
93. Curvaceous Dee from Curvaceous Dee @curvaceousdee
94. Evoe Thorne from My Whole Sex Life @WholeSexLife
95. Ponyboy from Marriage in the Bedroom @Ponyboy0000
96. Jack and Jill from Frisky in the 916 @jackandjillcpl and @jillandjackcpl
97. The Gentle Nibbles Writing Team from Gentle Nibbles @gentlenibbles
98. Kitty from The Submissive Wife
99. Kat from She Makes the Rules

100. YOU! As always, I want to leave a place on this list for ALL the awesome sex bloggers out there! So please leave a comment on Between My Sheets with your name/URL to tell us about your sexy blog!

I highlighted some of my favorites on the list. I wanted to also to contribute some blogs that didn’t make the list for whatever reason, but I would personally recommend.

AbSINthepassion

Rebecca Ammon

NaughtySpot

Kira’s Slavery

Two of these are pretty new blog sites and didn’t make the list because there was a “age” qualifier. Please go and discover new blogs, comment and let these people know you were there. A lot of work goes in to making an entertaining/aesthetically pleasing place on the web. I don’t know how everyone else does it, but I think about my site on a daily basis. I care about what I put out there and I care about how it is received. My blog is a piece of me, for good or bad. It is really an honor that it was recognized for sexy. Thanks!

e[lust] #40


Photo courtesy of @iSlut_ of A Slut’s Memoir�

 Welcome to e[lust] - The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at e[lust].  Want to be included in e[lust] #41? Start with the newly updated rules, come back October 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates! I’d like to also direct your attention to a new Editor’s Letter that’s up. 

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

The Bitch is Back - The temperature at the table drops several degrees. “Like that?,” I say.  ”Is that what you want?”

On Women Who Like Sex - I like sex as much as any man I know. I am not a weirdo, I am not a slut, and I am not in any excessive danger.

Secret SecretaryThere she was in the reception room on my couch, lying on her back, legs spread, skirt hiked up over her torso, her hands frantically feeling between her legs. 

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Street Harassment: It’s everywhere, all the time

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

Thoughts: Regarding Limits In BDSM

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Begin rant
Communication Breakdown
Family Planning
Great Expectation
My Fantasy
Rituals, Symbolism, Kink, and of course ME

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

How You Know You Are On The Rag
Intersecting

Kink & Fetish

Anal Slut
Belted
Flogger Use and Safety from a Beginner
Janet’s Magical Toybag
Protest Much?
Property of Seven
Playing With Fire
Please
Tonight I am going to fuck your (slave) ass
The Long-Anticipated Gangbang Post
Welcome To The Club

Erotic Writing

Almost Broken
Alive
A Bad Habit
A Sinner Sits for Sacred Sunday Service
BBQ & Beer
Birthday Sex
Cap D’Agde -spit roast with a stranger
Dirty Talk
Lolita Twenty-Twelve, Part Five
Matched
Oral at a Sex Party
once in a while
Revelation
Random memories: First love
Saturday Morning Pussy
Stress Reliever – Lubed Fingers
The shopping assistant
The Sting of the Crop
You

e[lust] #39

elustbutton200


Photo courtesy of Ava Grace

Welcome to e[lust] - The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at e[lust]. Want to be included in e[lust] #40? Start with the newly updated rules, come back September 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ Top 3 ~

Never Pinch a Sadist: 50 Shades of PlaidIf you don’t know kink, don’t feel pressured into it. If you wonder what it is about, join Fetlife and find local event to teach you about it.

Collars & closure & owning myselfthere is triumph in realizing that your paths are diverging, repacking your shit, and moving on with dignity and respect.

The QuarryWe agreed to meet up on the weekend and go out to the quarry. It was an old, flooded quarry. I didn’t know it, but the queers had taken it over.

~ Featured Post (Picked by Lilly) ~

The Pussy Pride Project

~ e[lust] Editress ~

“I can’t orgasm without a vibrator” So What?Embrace it. Bring it in to your partnered sex life. Be happy that you can achieve orgasm whatever way that works for you.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Erotic Writing

A Guest for Dinner
A Beautiful Need
A Purring Machine
A Hard Man is Good to Find
Chlorine Kisses
In a different world
I Crave You!
Lolita Twenty-Twelve, Part Four
Mojo Back
My 69th Orgasm
Owned Part 4
Sensual room service
Summertime
Tease Me
Travelling
The Space Between
The Text
The Wicked Wench of Wupert Stweet
The Desk of Power
Use Me
What I’m thinking about when I’m…
When Frederick Met Camille

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Living with an Alpha Sub
Make Her Cum
Restless
Swinging and safe sex
Talking with the Lights Off
The Promiscuous Bisexual
Why Do I Have More Respect For Men Than MRAs?
What not to do for anal sex
Wants, Needs & Poly
Wifi Sex?

Kink & Fetish

A Boot Scene
Consent as Torture
Mores and Behavior
Pursuit of Squirting
Playing With Lightning
Submissive men: A celebration of beauty
strapping on…my first time
Submission for a Femdom Facesitting Film
Steeped
rethinking warmup